I am messed up again...

I feel so messed up...i have an amazing life, a perfect wife, great friends! and sometimes all i do is sitting next to computer and jacking myself off....wanking like there is no tomorrow...i hate myself for this, because i feel like Im wasting so precious time...my grades are down, Im failing alot at college...today we having a test and i know that I am going to fail there again....this is so annoying! i wish i could try to study harder...when Im at work i feel like Im the boss, i know everything and i do it right! and fast as possible, but when i come home i feel like the "PORN MONSTER" is waiting for me, and whenever i have free time i just go and mastrubate...i used to enjoy it but now its like a devil inside me...got out of control'... i have so much enthusiasm and eagerness in my daily life, but it all ends up when i come home, drink my cofee, smoke a cigarette and go to masturbate....and i feel so fucking empty after...
And then when i look in the mirror i say that i look like shit! after all ive done...

Good People please help me, please dont judge me, because I am already judging myself all day long...Thank you and be safe, have a good life, and dont fall like me.